JOSEPH ESLER, CSCS, CISSN
After graduating from the University of Colorado at Boulder with a Bachelor of Science in electrical and computer engineering, I worked as an engineer for eight years with McKesson, a Fortune 7 company, the world's largest distributor of pharmaceuticals and the biggest company nobody has ever heard of. While I very much enjoyed helping doctors and nurses help patients, I wanted to help patients directly, so I became a personal trainer and nutritionist.
With expertise in both exercise and nutrition, I offer a holistic solution to help my clients improve their overall function/health/fitness/performance. My credentials comprise 33 personal training and nutrition certifications/certificates, several of which are accredited by the National Commission for Certifying Agencies (NCCA). My specialty is variety. From powerlifting to bodybuilding to sports performance to tactical conditioning to weight loss to corrective exercise to designing your own workout, I love it all. And, having won 6 out of 8 events in the Colorado Athletic Club's annual statewide CAC Games for my age group, I know how to apply my passion for variety to a real-world competition.
MY PERSONAL JOURNEY
My personal struggles include being, for lack of a better word, scrawny. Although not technically underweight, I have been relatively skinny without much muscle mass at about 150lb and 5'11". I have also been clinically obese at 233.8lb and around 30% body fat (the before picture at the bottom left of this page is after I had already lost 19lb and 5% body fat...I simply did not feel comfortable taking such a picture until then). And I have made that weight loss transformation twice. Yes, like many people, I have yo-yoed.
I have tried various diets from slow carb to keto to IIFYM. I have tried various exercise programs from Bodybuilding.com, Kinobody, and personal trainers - just as every doctor should have a doctor, every personal trainer should have a personal trainer, and I have had several.
I care a lot about continuing education, so I have studied sports physiology as a graduate student at Harvard Extension School. Here is my term paper presentation: Muscle Physiology in Female Athletes. I'm admitted as a master's candidate in the dramatic arts degree program.
Now I apply all of the above education and experience to engineer you a custom personal training and nutrition system following the philosophy of #1 safety, #2 efficiency, and #3 fun.
I'm also a stand-up comedian. I hit the Denver comedy scene pretty hard in 2014-2015, performing at the Denver Improv and Comedy Works and running a couple of open mics, one at a biker bar and the other next to a strip club. I originally started going to the gym to work on my stage presence before realizing it was also my passion and taking a hiatus from stand-up comedy. I plan to my return soon and am in the process of starting up a Comedy Toastmasters Club at the University of Colorado. Here's my early stand-up on YouTube.
On that note, my ideal client is a fan of the comedian Marc Maron, host of the WTF podcast. As he describes his fans, they're not a demographic but a disposition. Hopefully, that's you. I don't care what age, gender, or starting point you are. All I care is that you're driven/motivated/inspired to work hard *and* smart. That you'll do everything I program for you to the best of your ability. And keep me in the loop if you feel *anything* is not working so we can adjust it right away. But, most of all, I need you to embrace my three aforementioned principles of safety/efficiency/fun. Then we'll be a good fit.
At the risk of seeming infomercial-y, below are photos of my transformation from being on the cusp of clinical obesity for my height/weight to where I am today as a personal trainer and nutritionist.
If you haven't realized this already, I'm meticulous. My painstaking attention to detail takes *everything* into consideration. Before signing a contract with me, you must fill out a comprehensive - I dare say exhaustive - set of online forms to ensure you are ready to take the red pill and to ensure your exercise/nutrition regimen is the very best it can be. Nothing is cookie-cutter. All programming is tailor-made just for you like a tailor-made suit.
Here's sample programming for an actual female client in her late twenties with no known health issues - please note I've included only the first page of each:
"What are you waiting for? You're faster than this..."
Ready for your Mesomorpheus metamorphosis?
Countless people have transformed their lives with my chosen exercise methodologies, the Integrated Fitness Training (IFT) model from the American Council on Exercise (ACE) and the Optimum Performance Training (OPT) model from the National Academy of Sports Medicine (NASM), along with my nutrition strategies from Precision Nutrition (PN) and the International Society of Sports Nutrition (ISSN).
You can be one of those people. That's right. With the support of a coach who's been in your shoes, you can achieve your dreams, whatever those dreams may be. Oh, and please dream big. I myself settle for nothing less than the best. You should, too.